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The Antwerp Shitty Guide

The Shitty Guide has been making Antwerp a shittier place since 2007. Our shitty committy has spent years exploring all the brown bars, sex cinemas and cheapest restaurants in the city and its surroundings. All under the influence of carapils, of course.

We hope this guide will lead you to places that are shittier than you ever could have imagined and that you will have the shittiest day/week/month/year/life ever.

Antwerp. Because the rest is parking.

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Categories

  • #All
  • #Activity
  • #Bars
  • #Food
  • #Monument
  • #Nature
  • #Party
  • #Religion
  • #Sex
  • #Shopping

#Sex

Kinkys

Lange Beeldekensstraat 10
2060 Antwerpen
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#Monument

City's cancer

Dambruggestraat 129
2060 Antwerpen
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#Food

Wah-Kel

Verversrui 32
Antwerp Antwerpen
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#Party

Antwerp Tower

Van Ertbornstraat 10
Antwerpen Antwerpen
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#Shopping

Murad's Nightshop

Statiestraat 25
2600 Antwerpen
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#Bars

Tipanan Karaoke

10 Breydelstraat
2018 Antwerpen
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#Monument

Rubens Statue

Groenplaats
2000 Antwerpen
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#Religion

Jesus Loves You

Carnotstraat 13
2060 Antwerpen
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#Bars

In De Stad Aalst

Carnotstraat 16
2060 Antwerpen
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#Food

Frituur Petatje - CLOSED :(

Constitutiestraat
2060 Antwerpen
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#Bars

De Vogelenzang

Lange Beeldekensstraat 116
2060 Antwerpen
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#Bars

Het Pimpelhof

Lange Van Sterbeeckstraat 41
2060 Antwerpen
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#Food

Calamares

Handelstraat 40
2060 Antwerpen
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#Party

Pekfabriek

Kattenberg 93
2140 Antwerpen
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#Party

Bar Venetie

Turnhoutse baan 112
2140 Antwerpen
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#Shopping

Stunt

Turnhoutsebaan 74
Antwerpen Antwerpen
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#Bars

Cafe De Reiger

Lange Beeldekensstraat 326
2060 Antwerpen
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#Bars

Cafe Jozef

Astridplein 45
2018 Antwerpen
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#Sex

Cinema Royale

Koningin Astridplein 12
2060 Antwerpen
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#Shopping

Thissen Biljart

Van Wesenbekestraat 51-55
2060 Antwerpen
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#Bars

Snooker Point

De Coninckplein
Antwerpen Antwerpen
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#Bars

Cafe Strange

Dambruggestraat 161
2060 Antwerpen
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#Food

Beni Falafel

Lange Leemstraat 188
2018 Antwerpen
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#Food

Grillhouse 77

Lange Leemstraat 77
2018 Antwerpen
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#Bars

Memories

Heilig Hartstraat 12
2600 Antwerpen
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#Bars

Paradise

Van Stralenstraat 6
2000 Antwerpen
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#Bars

De Leeuw Van Vlaanderen

1 Jezuïetenrui
2000 Antwerpen
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#Party

Tafeltje Rond

Gildekamersstraat 10
2000 Antwerpen
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#Bars

Cafe Beveren

Vlasmarkt
2000 Antwerpen
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#Party

Izzy Maze

Leopold plaats 2
2000 Antwerpen
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#Monument

Vrijdagmarkt

Vrijdagmarkt
2000 Antwerpen
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#Bars

'T Keteltje

Oude mansstraat 26
2060 Antwerpen
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#Bars

Zevende Hemel

9 Oudemansstraat
2000 Antwerpen
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#Party

Cafe D'Anvers

Verversrui 15
2000 Antwerpen
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#Religion

Kerkschip

25 Houtdok-Noordkaai
2030 Antwerpen
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#Food

Ahaar

Lange Herentalsestraat 23
2018 Antwerpen
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#Bars

Café Cabron

Grote Markt
Antwerpen Antwerpen
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Should not be missed

Forget about the cathedral and Rubens' house these are the places you should really visit!

Cafe Strange

An oldfashioned Antwerp gaybar.

City's cancer

Got cancer? Probably not (yet). The city has it though. It’s located in a shady street right behind the Coninckplein.

In De Stad Aalst

A cosy brown bar near Central Station

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Random stuff about Antwerp

Some stuff you should know before coming to the city of Antwerp.

Shitty Tours

This summer Shitty Guide will tour you around the shittiest places our city has to offer

Getting Shitfaced On Carapils

Carapils, the worst or best beer in Belgium?

Shitty Souvenirs Except Chocolates

Shitty souvenirs you can buy for your loved ones at home

View more tips →

A day well spent in Antwerpen.

 How to spend a shitty day and night in Antwerp.

Doel

An apocalyptic town situated next to a nuclear power plant

Stunt

Madame Stunt has opened her shop almost thirty years ago and just left the interior the way it was

Calamares

An excellent fish restaurant where you can order kilos of fish

Cafe Strange

An oldfashioned Antwerp gaybar.

Bar Venetie

If you're tired of clubs and you want to party in a place where the bouncers doesn'tmind you look like a bum Bar Venetië is your sweet spot. Based in Borgerhout near the end of the Turnhoutse Baan Bar Venetïe isn't what you expect it to be. From the outside it looks like some shady bar but once inside you can go to the back where you can find the dancehall. Ona Friday nightchances are high you'll find 500 people sweating their asses of on some experimental electronic hipster gay music. This is definitely not an insult 'cause it will probably the best party going on in Antwerpen that very night. Not kidding! Gay people are the only people who really know how to party. During weekdays there won't be much going on here. You could have a chat with Angela, the Romanian barlady, who would maybe offer you a Palinka (Romanian schnaps) if she's in a good mood.

Cinema Royale

It was a lousy sunday and we thought to give Cinema Royale a chance. This is one of the oldest porn cinemas in Antwerpen. We were standing in front of the cinema just waiting to see who’s coming out of the cinema. Most of them were men around there fifties and were not very eager to answer my questions who was their favorite actor. They probably had to get home in time because of a family dinner. But then there was Jan, he wasn’t in any rush and didn’t have any family dinners planned I guess. He told usthe cinema royale is mainly a gay cinema. Middle aged men, or the daddies, meet young fellas or the other way around. So be aware special effects can be taken seriously in this place, forget about 3D folks. Jan told us it used to be different though. Gay men came here for a casual blow job but these days, you'll have to show green if you want some. "Oh thosegood old days", he said, "Everyone went to the Van Schoonhovenstraat, you could meet people and have a good time". The Van Schoonhovenstraat (the street accross the Astridplein parallel with the Van Wesenbekenstraat) used to be one of the most famous gaystreets in Antwerpen.You could hop from one gaybar to another. But as you may have noticed most of them have dissappeared, you'll still find a sex shop in this street but that's about it. You'll still find some hardcore bars behind the corner and Café Strange, one of the oldest gaybars of Antwerpen in the Dambruggestraat.

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